Parlez~me~'n~Tory

Rightly Wry, Satirically RIGHT

With the advent (Ed:good use of the word at this time of year) of Lord Mandelson claiming to want to give it all up so that he can tend some land, worry about the weather, look after his farm animals and listen to Farming Today one wonders where his true motives lie.

If, however, he is genuine I believe this house in Darwin, Falkland Islands could be just what he is looking for and crucially just far enough away from the mainland.

I understand that as a Peer the gentleman in question does not have access to immediate readies so am prepared to offer an assisted house purchase.

Who’ll start the bidding?

Do I see…

We all know there are those who should be on holiday right now and those who shouldn’t.

Generally, those who have thus far worked all year should be enjoying the break and those who haven’t (the vast majority of MP’s) shouldn’t be away from their desks.

The sad reality is that the enitrety of the Westminster village is deserted save from a few die-hards that ‘pop’ in every now and again but it was against this backdrop that one of the greatest miscarriages of justice this country has ever seen was conducted.

Worse still, it was conducted by the head of state, Her Majesty, The Queen.

So what is this travesty?

How about Baron Martin of Springburn, of Port Dundas in the City of Glasgow nonetheless! Following authorisation from The Queen this week.

There was enough embarrassment surrounding the decision that Parliament did not officially announce his Peerage instead they let it be known by the lesser channel of the London Gazette, which is the official outlet for Parliament but holds a readership level that is sadly trounced on a weekly basis by the Beano.

Let’s not forget that this bumbling idiot whilst now a Lord was the first speaker to be ousted from his post in more than 300 years.

There was a large calling for him to be denied the almost automatic honour and this was led by Lord Lawson of Blaby, the former Chancellor who had support from Lord Desai, a Labour peer, and Lord Oakeshott, a Liberal Democrat, who both said that the ex-Speaker would not be welcome in the Lords.

Well done Sirs, good effort.

Unfortunately we have our dear old meddler Hattie Harman to thank as just after the election of the new Speaker, the Leader of the House asked the Queen to reward Mr Martin for his service.

Harriet Harman moved the motion and it was carried without a vote.

The motion was worded as thus

That an humble Address be presented to Her Majesty, praying Her Majesty that she will be most graciously pleased to confer some signal mark of Her Royal favour upon the Right Honourable Mr Michael J Martin for his eminent services during the important period in which he presided with such distinguished ability and dignity in the Chair of this House

Maybe yesterday’s post which posed the question what’s in it for you Jack should be reworded to what’s in it for you Hattie?

Baroness Harman? Perish the bloody thought!

What’s the big idea Jack?

Upon hearing that you are attempting to push through changes to the Constitutional Reform Bill one can’t help but wonder what’s in it for Jack?

You get nowt for nowt in this world and this Government does nowt for nobody unless it is self serving so I make no apologies for the scepticism.

The question begs Jack that if you are trying to stop life Peers from standing as an MP for up to 5 years, just how long does up to actually mean?

…and when you finally admit the answer please let the Great British public know what your timeline is when you say

as soon as Parliamentary time allows