Ten Civil Servants standing in a line
One of them was downsized
Then there were nine

Nice Civil Servants who must negotiate
One joined the union
Then there were eight

Eight Civil Servants thought they were in heaven
‘til one of them was redeployed
Then there were seven

Seven Civil Servants, their jobs are safe as bricks
One was reclassified
Then there were six

Six Civil Servants trying to survive
One of them was privatised
Then there were five

Five Civil Servants ready to give more
But one left on long-term sick
Reducing them to four

Four Civil Servants full of loyalty
Then their jobs were advertised
And now there were three

Three Civil Servants under review
One left on secondment
Then there were two

Two Civil Servants coping on the run
One went on stress leave
Then there was one

The last Civil Servant agreed to relocate
Replaced by 10 consultants
At thrice the hourly rate

There is a lot of speculation and argument about the exact situation of Laws and his partner, his sexuality and his right to rent rooms from his alleged lover. This is all going to become rather messier than it is even at present. I shall not enter into discussion regarding the private life of David Laws and I believe others should let that alone too but that is entirely up to them.

What I believe should happen now is that the Deputy Prime Minister, Nick Clegg should act by advising his Minister to resign his post by the end of the weekend. Now is the perfect time with Parliament being in recess, this would give chance for a new Cabinet Minister to get up to speed over the next few days.

This would also remove any overhang from the old politics that we so eagerly sought to move away from. This will also enable the Coalition, the Lib Dems and David Laws to stand on the moral high ground and enforce the reality of honest politicis upon the nation.

I believe right now that David Cameron is probably briefing Nick Clegg to the effect of the above and it will become clearer within the next 24hrs that David Laws will resign his Cabinet post for the sake of the Coalition, the nation and what is right for British politics.

Yes, Laws was in the wrong but Britain does not need another 5 years of hypocrisy from our Government and the Coalition does not need to be handing easy targets to the Opposition.

As described to me on Twitter by @SnappingLawyer this morning “The show must go on!”

It is fair that Nadine, Kate and others can call the vote for the chair of the Speaker, after all, this House is supposed to be the bastion of democracy, the last place whereby man can call his master to account.

With that in mind it is somewhat disappointing that Twitter is full of self-interested bloggers today calling Nadine a liar and a spiteful person. What Nadine is doing in fact is issuing more chance for free speech than these bloggers ever have or ever will.

Personally, I hope the vote is called for Mr Bercow today. The vote would take place as an open vote, we would all know where those die-hard MPs had voted or indeed where those newbie’s had voted. Or, whether either had abstained.

One could argue that to usher in the new form of Politics, leaving behind the old term bias and scandal we need to have a vote on the Speaker. In my personal view Jon Bercow has done an admirable job, not spectacular but admirable, he, however, has let himself down on a number of ocasions but I put that down to the heat of the moment in the Political meltdown that was the death of the previous Government, a man is permitted to mourn.

So, at 14:30 Sir Peter Tapsell, The Father of the House will call for the Aye’s and the No’s and there will be sufficient No’s that in Sir Peter’s mind the House will split and a vote forced.

That vote will see the return of Jon Bercow to the role of Mr Speaker and leave Ming Campbell rueing his missed opportunity.

Jon Bercow will be returned not because he is necessarily the best man for the job but because this would be one change too far in too quick a time for the House to subsume. It is right that his authority is tested but the public would not thank the Coalition for what would be seen as a “dirty tricks” campaign to unseat The Speaker of the House.

Jon Bercow will be returned simply because now is not the time to do this.

Following a discussion (within the comments of that blog post) it transpires that I was somewhat accosted not by a member of the campaign team but an everyday “passionate” supporter of the Liberal Democrats. I, as you all know am a staunch Conservative but of the most pleasant order. I am conciliatory, I am considerate, I am caring.

It seems that now David Heath’s campaign team probably believe I am the devil in carnate whilst not strictly true I have taken the opportunity to set the record straight in the original blog post but wish to affirm to my readers that there was some dirty campaigning that has no place in our society.

If, David’s team takes the trouble to view Twitter and the rest of the blog posts over the past year they will see that I am very much on board with the coalition, very much in tune with what we are trying to do and very much mindful of people’s feelings and correcting any “misunderstandings” (this, incidentally, is the first correction to be made in a year of blogging).

In addition, I would welcome any support shown by my Liberal Democrat followers or readers to affirm on here and/or via Twitter that I am not in fact the devil incarnate, that nomenclature is reserved for Ed Balls!

“It’s a huge honour and privilege to be appointed as Minister of State for Housing and I very much look forward to getting down to the issues of state.

“It’s a role I feel very comfortable in and well prepared for, having shadowed the brief for three years, facing four different housing ministers in that time.

“I look forward to continuing and developing my relationships with the industry and feel sure that our new Government will be able to make genuine improvements to the housing industry which has suffered so badly under 13 years of Labour Government.”

I am saddened by the lack of women and or ethnic minorities, more of the same

I was shocked by this claim. This is the first diverse Cabinet in 65 years in terms of spreading the base over more than 1 Political Party.

In addition to that, the Cabinet is made up of 24 posts. Of that, 2 posts (Dave and Nick) are already taken and they are already men so cannot go to any other candidate.

That leaves 22 posts, of that the LD have 4 more posts, the make up of the LD is such that not by any fault other than these candidates have won their seats there are no black or ethnic minority posts.

So, we are left with 18 posts of those 18 posts we have 4 women Cabinet Ministers and the Country’s first Muslim. Was this good enough? Who knows.

What I do know is that this is finally a break and a very welcome one from the Labour ethos whereby somebody gets a job by virtue of being a member of an ethnic minority or by virtue of being the lady in the room. This is the situation whereby a person gets a job by virtue of being the right candidate for the role and if that means it drops or raises the percentage of diversity within the Government then so be it.

Well, I don’t think we are even anywhere near to examining what went right or wrong, that should be a process we undertake as an ongoing task throughout the life of this Parliament and throughout the next 3 or 4 years.

Yesterday, Gordon Brown did something that finally made the nation proud, his very dignified exit from No10.

This is a very historic moment with the Conservatives working together with the Liberal Democrats and a fixed term Parliament. VERY historic.

What I do feel as my responsibility though and that of my fellow bloggers and tweeters is a duty to be honest. A duty to tell it like it is, warts and all.

PLEASE let’s not go the way of so many on the LEFT whilst they were crumbling and bury our heads in the sand. Stand up and say if you think something is wrong. Stand up and let the Government know if you feel they have fundamentally got an issue wrong or overlooked something.

We won the race in the bloggersphere hands down and that was partly due to our ability to be forward thinking and critical of the Government whilst still taking our own side to task. I put it to you this morning PLEASE DON’T STOP, DON’T LOSE THAT FREEDOM.

Stick to those principles and I am sure this Government will not just deliver but also return a majority Government within the full term of this Parliament.

Whilst it would be fun to put a picture up here at this stage I shall abstain, you get the image, no help needed.

If, as it is becoming a little clearer this afternoon that a deal is on the cards between the Conservatives and the Liberal Democrats I want to go on record that I DO NOT TRUST NICK CLEGG, nor some of the other “negotiating” team, (official ones or not) and yes, that’s you Mr Cable.

I live in a Lib Dem marginal whereby a very hard working PPC was beaten, partly by the Labour vote, partly by the UKIP vote and partly because of Class smears by David Heath’s team possibly by an over enthusiastic supporter. These overtones of rotten politicis disgust me, they play all nice with local businesses but they launch into a tirade of abuse when given the chance. Quite simply I cannot take what a Lib Dem in my constituency says as the truth.

So, if you want to work out where I stand on this pact thing just read my blog posts from this morning at one stage even advocating a minority Government, at others suggesting the Lib/Lab pact should go ahead, all with good reasons. I am not comfortable with a Con/Lib pact but I trust David Cameron, William Hague and George Osborne not to have sold my Party down the swanny and that the percentage of the UK seats won by the Lib Dems is proportionate within any Government.

Let’s wait for the real (if there is any) announcement.

....well, would you?....

Enough said!

Labour could yet come out of this whole fiasco smelling of roses and still save Britain!

If Labour refuse to do a pact with the Liberal Democrats at the same time as the Conservatives refuse to do a pact with them this will put Nick The Arrogant squarely back in his place having missed the only boat they will ever be offered.

Labour have already set the ball rolling to replace their leader, if they allow a Conservative minority Government and assist by voting the Queen’s speech through they can, [almost] legitimately stand for Election in 10 months time on a mandate of CHANGE and FRESH FOCUS.

I personally think if that were the case the Conservatives would still be returned with a working majority and I am ready for that challenge.

Can we count on the Labour Party doing the right thing for the country?

Jack? Jack? Where's my Jack?

As for Nick (The Arrogant) Clegg whilst claiming to do what is best for the country has lurched to his natural side.

Nick The Arrogant

When the next General Election is called, Labour will say look at us, we are progressive, we have worked with the Liberals for 4 months we have a new leader, a new focus and new energy to guide Britain through this rough time (forgetting they caused the rough time) then they will say look at them, the Tories, that Cameron he lost a General Election.

Dave, pack up your things and prepare to move into No10, the Conservatives need to move to form a minority Government in the face of the underhandedness by Nick The Arrogant who clearly cannot be trusted.

None of this is reality but it is what will become Labour reality if this all pans out. Whatever happens this is a VERY bad day for democracy in this country.

Yes, the Conservative Party gained a majority but not a working overall majority. There are polls and arguments going on in every Party at every level as to why each Party failed to do better, this should be apparent more in the Lib Dems than any other Party but it is not, at least not just yet.

Labour claim they want AV but only because it favours them. Lib Dems claim they want PR but only because it favours them. We, are content with FPTP but it does not favour us, if we change boundaries and make each constituency the same size then that will favour us. but, we are where we are and it is sadly FPTP that got us in this position.

Now then, the Lib Dems had a crap night on Thursday there are no two ways about it but they had a great morning on Friday because it allows them to hide their dreadful performance at #ge10.

It is now the Lib Dems who hold the card, not much of one but just enough to determine who may or who may not lead the next Government. But all of a sudden Nick Clegg has become rather arrogant.

He is almost holding the British electorate to ransom, pretending to scrutinise what is on offer from both the Conservatives and Labour Parties. He talks of a deal in the coming days, he talks of needing further details yet he talks of doing what is right for the nation.

I want a Conservative Government but I don’t want the David Cameron to sell the Party down the line and I don’t believe he will. What I don’t want is some arrogant jumped up two-bit player getting off telling journalists, MP’s and the electorate that he is taking his time.

Nick, either step up to the mantel, make that statement and right now I don’t care if you go Lab/Lib or Con/Lib, I want a Conservative Government but I don’t want one so badly as to have to bow to you.

We,ve already said
Goodbye
Since you gotta go, oh you’d better
Go now go now, go now (Go now)
Before you see me cry
I don’t want you to tell me just what you intend to do now
‘Cause how many times do I have to tell you darlin’, darlin’
I’m still in love with you now
Whoa-oh-oh-oh

We’ve already said
So long
I don’t wanna see you go, oh you’d better
Go now go now, go now (Go now)
Don’t you even try
Tellin’ me that you really don’t want it to end this way
‘Cause darlin’, darlin’, can’t you see I want you to stay
Yeah, yeah

Since you gotta go, oh you’d better
Go now go now, go now (Go now)
Before you see me cry
I don’t want you to tell me just what you intend to do now
‘Cause how many times do I have to tell you darlin’, darlin’
I’m still in love still in love with you now
Whoa-oh-oh-oh
I don’t wanna see you go but darlin’, you better go now

Dave offers a comprehensive package offering Nick the chance to get many of his policies on the agenda.

How will it pan out? In my mind Brown will seal the deal with Nick who cannot see through the lies and subterfuge. Brown and Clegg will seal a deal, stitch up the Conservative Party and the final sweetener will be Brown to stand down with D Miliband to takeover as PM.

Britiain then faces another 5 years of an unelected leader of the ruling party and a decidedly dodgy Government that will only be challenged when the truth of how bad the books are in about 3 years time.

I fear it will be a sad day and the man who deserves to be PM may never get there.

We have canvassed, canvassed and then canvassed some more, delivered, delivered and then delivered until the letterboxes made our fingers bleeds. Today was always going to be one last final push and what a day it has been.

At every turn of almost every corner within Frome I have seen a Lib Dem foot soldier reminding me why we are going at this constituency so very strong and so very hard, no chance to rest, no desire to rest only a desire to see what is right for this constituency and what is (at least in my opinion) right for this country, a Conservative Government.

I reside in #somertonandfrome the 5th largest constituency in the country some 900 square miles. We are currently represented in Parliament by David Heath (Lib Dem), the problem we have is that he has in the words of many town folk done an “ok” job, not spectacular, not great but just “ok”. Trouble is though, that is all that is needed to allow an incumbent to achieve success in such a tight marginal.

Tonight, or rather at 3am when the count is announced in Yeovil we require a swing of just 0.56% to turn blue. We are only 814 votes behind, again though, we are hampered. The Labour vote in Frome is non-existent and the local candidate has all but ordered his following to vote Lib Dem, so that’s another potential 5000 votes and that would surely throw us back again.

I am very proud of my PPC Annunziata Rees-Mogg and as she can attest I am fiercely loyal but always play with a straight bat, I hate underhandedness, I hate spiteful politics, I despise playground politics (something I hope my twitter following will also attest to).

Annunziata has done a wonderful job on the campaign and in truth she’s got much better legs than David Heath. I know just how much effort this lady has put into her constituency and CCHQ should be very proud of her too and should the results go the right way this lady will make a first rate MP.

I just wish to register my gratitude to the Conservative Party both locally and nationally for a first rate, totally clean and extremely positive campaign in the face of much adversity.

If the country ends up with a hung Parliament it will be just like Suggs and Madness sang, tomorrow’s just another day. However, should the Conservatives gain a working majority then it will be very much a Nina Simone moment

Its a new dawn, its a new day, its a new life for me
yeah, its a new dawn its a new day its a new life for me ooooooooh
AND I’M FEELING GOOD

Whichever colour you have fought for in #ge10 providing you have fought fair you have my appreciation and respect.

Finally, please spare a thought for Nigel Farage and his family and that of the pilot.

This is one activist who will now be sitting with some good Shiraz, a curry and the prospect of an all-nighter in front of the news.

This is not a blog post contributed by some fanatical (can’t see the wood for the trees) grass rootist, this is not an anti-Government or anti-Labour rant, no, this is the genuine, honest account of a hard working, take nothing for nothing British worker who has seen good times and bad times. A contribution by a man who has never earned over £12k in any given year in his entire life, owns his own home, has never sat back and demanded that society owes him or his family anything yet who has everything he needs.

This is a contribution that I am proud to host this morning as I truly believe it shows how so many people on the streets of Britain are thinking and feeling this morning. If you enjoy this contribution (whether you feel you agree or not please consider using one of the “share this” buttons at the foot of the post, if you only use Twitter there is one specifically for that too).

Finally, this contribution is unedited in any way save for one small spelling error as I feel I at least owe that much to the contributing author, my father, Alan Wicks.

My life as a Tory

My introduction to politics came when I was fairly young, my parents (in particular my Mother) were staunch Conservatives, as a result of which, when I was about 10/11 years old I would be found outside the polling station at election time “telling” for the Tories (Although Tories was considered a bit of an insult then when it was really known then as the Conservative and Unionist Party).

I would be “telling” from the opening of the polls, which in those days was much earlier, before heading off to school. After school on Polling Day I would go with my Parents to the Party Committee Rooms at the bottom of our road to help record those voters we knew had voted and chase up those who had still to vote.

These were days when everyone knew very few people who owned a motor vehicle, but those supporters and activists who did own a car would volunteer to drive the elderly and infirm to the polling stations to cast their vote. Although young, I can still remember attending the “Count” at Hornsey Town Hall and cheering the result when our candidate won.

The first Election I can really remember was when Sir David Gammon was up against the Labour Candidate R.A.Pestell, in 1952 when Sir David won with a vote of 36,417 vs 25,643, Out of an electorate of 75,131 there was an 82.6% turnout (unlike the apathy of today) giving Sir David a majority of 17.36% (OK, I do not remember the figures which I have obtained today from the internet, but I do remember him winning).

I can recall him coming into the committee rooms whilst I was there and coming over to speak with me, being the youngest person there.

When Sir David died he was succeeded in his post by his wife Lady Muriel Gammon.

I always voted Conservative for the rest of my life when I voted in a General Election or ByElection, but not always did I manage to get to the polling stations. When Margaret Thatcher became PM I was obviously very happy and expected good things for the future, and in general I was not dissapointed, I agreed with most of her policies but must admit to being disappointed that she was not able to implement all of them.

I still feel that the Principles behind the “Poll tax” was a lot fairer than either the previous “Rates” or current “Council Tax”, something I know will probably upset a lot of people, even fellow Tories, but there again, I am talking about “principles” behind the concept which was not necessarily recognized by everyone.

By the time Tony Blair and New Labour won the right to govern I must admit to being secretely a little relieved because there had been so much infighting within the Tory Party and so much reported sleaze that I felt it was good that they would have a short period to regroup, fully expecting Labour to fail within a couple of years, therefore giving us a chance to regain power.

Blair’s claim of an open government, no sleaze etc sounded good, but it soon become obvious that sleaze is only something that is practiced by the ruling party, at least, it is normally only the ruling party that gets the stick for it, if it is the Opposition party it tends to be overlooked, unless there is a pending election.

Anyway, I was getting more and more frustrated with the way Labour was completely changing our lives, controlling everything we do and making more and more things illegal, without even properly consulting with us that I was absolutely overjoyed when I discovered that my youngest son had applied to CCHQ to become a PPC.

I had never to my knowledge pressurised him in any direction regarding Politics or Religion, I believed my kids should follow their heart and I would support them in their beliefs, even if it differed with my own, it at least meant they were making sensible judgements of their own and not being pressurised into their opinions.

We had never, as far as I can remember had any serious political discussions so I was extremely supportive of his ambitions.

I was disapointed when he was turned down due to the volume of applicants on this occasion, and slightly relieved at the same time when I realised what it could cost him financialy at this particular time in his life, but I know he is determined and he is planning on following his heart and applying again in the future and he will have my 100% support.

I said earlier that I had always voted Tory in major elections, though I must admit on a couple of local elections I have voted Independent rather than follow the party line if I knew the Independent candidate and believed they would be the best person for the job irrespective of my Conservative beliefs.

I have also worked with the Liberals (pre LibDem days) in a local dispute, something I started and they tried to jump in, I was happy for their support, but they certainly did not ask for or gain any voting support from me.

I firmly believe that this country is now in a terrible state and that we desperately need a change for the future and that the Tories are the only Party that can give us this.

OK, I know there is going to be a long period of real Pain in order to recover our position in the world, but there is at last a chance of a light at the end of the tunnel, when Britain can once again be great, we can be proud of our once great nation and we can prosper, our kids will once again be properly educated, our businesses will prosper, bringing employment opportunities to nearly everyone and our streets will be safe to walk once more.

And finally, when we hear someone say “Trust me, I am a politician” we can believe and trust in them.

....and now, the end is near and so I face....

Bloody right if this is anything to by!

Parlez_me_nTory is not in the least bit tempted to caption this image DANCE BITCH!

and last year you said

Only the Liberal Democrats will clean up Westminster, reform expenses

…and given that Chris Huhne said this at your spring conference

Remember not a single Liberal Democrat MP flipped their home.

Not a single Lib Dem MP avoided capital gains tax.

Not a single Lib Dem MP in London claimed a second home allowance at all.

How can you explain this headline MPs’ expenses: Lib Dem MPs broke rules by taking landlord payments

Is there any chance of YOU standing up to apologise in next weeks #pmqs?