Parlez~me~'n~Tory

Rightly Wry, Satirically RIGHT

I am not bitter, not in the least but I am disappointed not in you (the reader) or TotalPolitics but in myself.

Never one to make excuses I take full responsibility for not achieving my goal of reaching the Top100 Conservative blogs list. I simply have not put enough effort into the blog during the year, I know that. The fact that I would rather look after my family in times of sickness is, I think something of a credit to human kindness, so perhaps I should’ve expected the absence of this blog in the list.

It’s odd because for so long now I have thought of Twitter as an extension to my blog when in reality my persona is on Twitter. What you read in my Tweets really is me. It is on twitter I live and breathe daily and it should be that the blog is an extension of Twitter. I can see now that I didn’t have my priorities round the wrong way but I believed that I did have.

This blog is not going anywhere and one day it may make that list but from today my priorities are being restated. I know I can do good with this blog and therefore it will continue to be satirical, truthful, blunt and sometimes downright good fun.

You see, during the General Election 2010 I was the 16th Most Influential Twitterer within the Political Arena. I was responsible for the 4th most used hashtag during the election #GE10. I was also responsible for #JohnPrescottsPhone so I know where my future lies, safely on Twitter with this blog right here to back my Tweets up when more than 140 characters is needed.

So, given that at January 1st this year I had less than 300 followers and that I set myself a target of 1000 by the night of #GE10 (achieved 36hrs early) I have now set myself the target of 1500 followers by the end of this month. This evening that meant 160 to go. It is a challenge and one that I am up for.

It is now my aim to concentrate ensuring the Twitter side of @Parlez_me_nTory reaches the maximum audience that it can. The first step is to increase the followers to 1500 once there the business plan will be written.

In 11 days time I embark on a year long course of study at the Royal Holloway University of London for my MSc in Information Security hoping to specialise in Information Crime but during that time and given moments of lucid study I shall be found amongst the pages of Twitter. I shall be out of my house at 5:30 daily not returning until 20:30 daily but I shall still be with you.

There is one other change that I have to announce and that is to enable me to fully concentrate on the Parlez_me_nTory I have to close my original Twitter account, the one that shares its name with this domain name @Wicksie Please do not follow this account if you are please feel free to unfollow with all haste. I wouldn’t wish the name to go to another user so when I work out how best to close but keep the name or account I shall.

I don’t wish to go the way of Mark Reckons who has closed his blog nor the way of Jack of Kent who has closed his Twitter account as I believe there is a way for both to exist in my circumstance.

So, all that is left for me to say at this point is IF you are NOT following me please consider doing so, IF you ARE following please consider spreading the word and IF you have BLOCKED me then you’re sadly missing out.

One of my favourite works of art…artist unknown

The state of our country

Well, that was rather incredible to be honest, watching the machinations of ALL sides during those 5 days.

After tonight’s programme my respect, albeit not a high level of respect for Lord Adonis has all but evaporated, he struck me as desperate on every level. Though having met Sir Gus O’Donnell in the past I was, as always rather impressed by his cool headed attitude.

I was in absolute awe of the candid access Nick Robinson had during the 5 days, from the screenshot of David Cameron’s laptop as he telephoned Nick Clegg whilst trying to form the coalition to the admissions of some of the ministers (not always to their benefit).

What came through from the LibDem side was to me that it is clear who doesn’t sit comfortably with the coalition but the vast majority do, at least currently they do, and there are some Labour representatives that don’t even think they did a thing wrong. It is obvious that something had to give and both parties did what was right to get the deal done, to put Britain back on the road to recovery, to stop the rot.

What else came through is that Ed Balls didn’t come across very well at all, that is not just from a Tory point of view, it makes it look very clear as though it was all the fault of Ed. Quite simply it won’t do his leadership bid any good whatsoever.

I am saddened that Gordon did not speak, was not interviewed, you could almost see the tears in Peter Mandelson’s eyes in that photo just before leaving. I do not know why he did not appear but can only assume it was his own choice.

One thing is very certain, politics in Britain has changed forever as a result of these 5 days as has access to the details that we will from now on demand of our media representatives.

Kudos to Nick Robinson for he has done something very special here and for the record Paul Waugh from the Evening Standard, this program was #worththelicencefeealone. We have all been a part of history.

Don’t waste time reading this, get BBC2 on and watch Five Days That Changed Britain…then consider coming back

As stated, I don’t do caption contests, but if I did and with all eyes on Dave in this G8 image from yesterday this would be prime for something referencing Gillian Duffy, Sue and a man who shall not be named

...and then he said

Our Prime Minister

We, as you have worked our bollocks off and quite rightly the result is correct, Thank you Dave and thank you Samantha.

UPDATE: After a discussion with a member of David Heath’s campaign team (see comments below) it seems that the comments I attributed to the campaign team themselves seemingly originated from an over enthusiastic supporter of the Liberal Democrats, I am amending this blog post accordingly:

Whilst it would be fun to put a picture up here at this stage I shall abstain, you get the image, no help needed.

If, as it is becoming a little clearer this afternoon that a deal is on the cards between the Conservatives and the Liberal Democrats I want to go on record that I DO NOT TRUST NICK CLEGG, nor some of the other “negotiating” team, (official ones or not) and yes, that’s you Mr Cable.

I live in a Lib Dem marginal whereby a very hard working PPC was beaten, partly by the Labour vote, partly by the UKIP vote and partly because of Class smears by David Heath’s team possibly by an over enthusiastic supporter. These overtones of rotten politicis disgust me, they play all nice with local businesses but they launch into a tirade of abuse when given the chance. Quite simply I cannot take what a Lib Dem in my constituency says as the truth.

So, if you want to work out where I stand on this pact thing just read my blog posts from this morning at one stage even advocating a minority Government, at others suggesting the Lib/Lab pact should go ahead, all with good reasons. I am not comfortable with a Con/Lib pact but I trust David Cameron, William Hague and George Osborne not to have sold my Party down the swanny and that the percentage of the UK seats won by the Lib Dems is proportionate within any Government.

Let’s wait for the real (if there is any) announcement.

DollyWagon.com released their Twitter Political – Top 30 most influential tweeters today

Interesting to note not only does my hashtag of #ge10 appear the 4th most used. But that Parlez_me_nTory is listed 16th out of the top 30 well ahead of @JohnPrescott – @BevaniteEllie and @BBCLauraK

Ah, happy days indeed. Now then, let’s transfer this euphoria into a reality and get some semblance of order back into British Politics!